Success Warrior: The Blog That Embraces ADHD

Bond, Ethibond

 
So,

While the doctor is not willing to say that my wife is allergic to ethibond sutures, he confirmed that she had several spitting sutures.  I came home and looked up the term to see if he was making it up.  He wasn't.  It's when the body tries to expel sutures from the body similar in fashion to trying to evict a sliver. 

We spent our day having spitting sutures surgically removed from her belly button and by "we", I mean "she" because all I did was sit in the cafeteria and read.

We're home now and I'm going to go check up on her.

Medicine Ball Planks (abs)

Crumbs chief!

I am beat down. 

This morning we did abs and everyone in class was completely hammered before we started.  I told everyone to take it easy and I even cut the class in half from what was planned when I created this two month Frankenstein.

In my case, it doesn't help that I'm coming off of a 5 month "light work only" and then, on top of that, I could not sleep last night.  Trey had a nightmare at 10:30, which didn't wake me because I was still awake but trying to get back to sleep.  Then I woke up at 12:30.  I fell back to sleep around 2 and then I woke up at 3:30 and stayed up.  Screw it.

Then I tried to go out and do an ab workout when my abs were still sore from last week's ab workout.  Not. a. chance.

So, we quit early, which worked out for me anyway because I had to jet for the city for some more physical therapy and more trigger point injections.  I was a bit surprised because I have really felt good for the last couple of days.  I sit down in the chair and the therapist says, "Let me know if I hit a trigger point."  Roger that.  I'm all kinds of relaxed, just sitting there thinking that this should be a snap.

She pushes a spot on my back and I immediately leap up in the air, do a spinning back kick to her jaw, and then when I land, I whip out a cross and a silver dagger.

What the hell was that?

Okay, I just flinched forward trying to escape her death touch but you get the idea.  She takes her blue Sharpie and circles the spot on my back. 

She touches me again.

Same damn thing.

5 times in a row, she touches me and induces sharp pain into my muscles.  I swear this woman has X-ray vision and can see the damaged areas right through my skin.

"How are you doing that?" I asked, trying to buy some time before she jabs me again.

"I've done this before," Bam!  Another one.  She finally has to start searching around, getting hit and miss but she's already sunk my battleship.

She changed the position of my arm and says she's going to check a different muscle, after which she does the Vulcan nerve pinch and drops me to the floor, where I lay weeping, and begging her to grant me a quick death.

I'm going to have a chat with my magic tennis ball.  I don't want to complain because she's doing great but damn!  A little help here, please.

After she has made enough circles with her blue Sharpie to get B-I-N-G-O, she goes and gets a resident with a needle.  He pops the cap on the needle and goes, "Whoa!"  My back is turned but my ears perk up like a German Shepherd sensing an intruder.

He then explains that they left the needle on that they use to pull the medicine into the syringe and it's a tad big for sticking into patients.  He switches needles and starts jabbing me and injecting the stuff and other than one spot, it's all much less painful than the therapist's X-ray death touch from hell.

Now, of course, it all hurts because I don't respond to that stuff as quickly as other people apparently do.  It will feel much better tomorrow but today, not so much.

Then I drove home.  4 hours on the road for a 20 minute doctor visit.  The cool thing is that I don't have to go back for 6 weeks unless something goes wrong. 

My workout space is kind of like a big toy room for me (and I have my eye on some more toys for it).  While I'm out there, I tend to be thinking about what kind of different things I can do with the toys.  I've got a couple of ab exercises for you that came about from me just playing around between circuits (yes, I know, I should probably be resting between circuits). 

Here's one that requires no motion.  Exercise without moving.  How couch potato is that?

Do that for 60 seconds and see how that feels.  It's like plank but you're also going to feel your obliques twitching to as they try to stabilize your body and keep the balls from moving.  As you move your hands in, you force your body to deal with balancing even more. 

I did a variation where I had both hands on medicine balls too but thought that might be a bit much but you can certainly do it if you want to force your abs to deal with even more instability.  Hmmm, I wonder why my abs are still sore.  I'll have to think about that for a bit.

Anyway, if you have a some medicine balls, or any other balls that would be tough enough for your weight (basketball, soccer, or one of each), give these a shot and let me know what you think.  See how long you can hold the plank position and report back.

Tomorrow, I'll share the ab exercise that blasted my abs for the week.

Stay tuned.

***

Follow me on Twitter to get updates on when new posts show up on this blog (plus get random thoughts on the life of Success Warrior) and feel free to "friend" me on Facebook.

Success Warrior is an Independent BeachBody Coach for BeachBody.com, a company that offers fitness programs, supplements, and equipment that have absolutely changed my life. 

Have you heard of P90X?  That's BeachBody.  They also have Insanity, Turbo Jam, TurboFire, RevAbs, Brazil Butt Lift, and many more.  They have some of the best exercise programs on the market.  These aren't just DVDs but are complete programs to transform your body.  They also have the hugely popular, and what they call "the most important meal of the day", Shakeology.  Go HERE to learn the most inexpensive way to get Shakeology.

They have equipment and supplements in addition to Shakeology and popular exercise programs.  Visit BeachBody.com and click on the "Shop" link to see everything they offer. 

There is also a business side to all this fitness that you can take advantage of.  Whether you're looking to just make a couple hundred extra dollars in fun money or are looking to take complete financial control of your life, BeachBody can help you get there.  If you have a desire to be more fit and would love to help other people do the same while making some money at it, visit BeachBody.com and click on the "Coach" link.  Team up with me and I'll help you reach your goals, in fitness and finance.

The Primal Blueprint Cookbook

My copy of The Primal Blueprint Cookbook by Mark Sisson arrived today and I've had a quick scan through it.  Very quick so I don't even have too many first impressions for you but I can say that the Universe is great at answering queries. 

My wife and I were talking this morning because she wants to incorporate breakfast into her plan but she doesn't have time to make or eat breakfast before leaving for work.  I asked her if she wanted me to cook something for her that she could take to work.  I usually have time to cook (not tomorrow - dangit!) so I figured that I could make something while I'm cooking up my eggs and then she could take it with her.

So, I'm glancing through the Primal cookbook, looking at the pictures mostly (but I bought it for the articles, I promise) and I see something that catches my eye.  It's not anything new at all but something that might fit the bill exactly.  Omelets cooked in muffin tins with the muffin wrapper and everything.  How cool is that!  She can tell me what she wants in her omelet, I can make it, and she can take it with her and eat it easily without the need for any utensils.  I have to run the idea by her but how can you not like that idea?  Make up a batch, throw 'em in the fridge, and nuke 'em for a quick bite to eat. 

Score.

Have you ever worked your ass glutes so hard that it hurts to sit down?  Crikey! 

And my calves still haven't healed.  It feels like someone kicked them, like they are bruised.  Now, normally, this is a distinct possibility because of karate class but last week, I was strictly on the teaching end of the hitting and kicking.  This week, I'm going to be on the receiving end a bit as I jump in with everyone else except my #1 student.  #1 went to do a take-down last week and missed the grab and broke his thumb.  All the violence that we share in my class and he breaks his own damn thumb. 

Tomorrow, I have physical therapy but can I just say that I am feeling much better and I have a new BFF.  Of all the painful and expensive procedures that I have had, do you know what has worked the best?

A tennis ball.

Can you believe that?  My therapist told me to go buy a tennis ball (you actually have to buy 3 tennis balls much to Trey's delight with the bonus 2 and now my neighbors delight since those extra 2 balls have now been whacked over the back fence into the neighbor's yard - you're welcome neighbor) and you place said tennis ball on the ground. 

Okay, I was going to insert more parenthesis but my wandering thoughts get long enough that I'm going to give this tangential thought it's own paragraph.  My physical therapist did not say to put the ball on the ground.  She said to put it in this sock thingy so that I could hold the ball in place by holding opposite ends of the socky thingy and lean up against the wall.  I suck at following instructions. 

Anyway, you I place the tennis ball on the ground and then I lay on it.  You move around until you feel the ball on a knot or tender spot and then you stop moving and apply gentle pressure on it for a while.  "A while" being subjective and based on how long it takes before you feel like the knot has released.

Last night, I'm doing this drill and on about the third spot, I feel a release like a soap bubble popping.  Completely non-violent but not the melting away that you might associate with a knot working its way out.  It was there and then it was gone.  And man!  Everything else seemed to feel better too.  I may have even had a vision or something.  There was a ray of light, angelic singing, and some hot chick holding a plate with a medium rare rib-eye on it.  Is heaven like Hooters?

This isn't to say that all the other stuff hasn't helped or done it's part or set this possibility up but last night is the best that my back has felt in 5 months.  The ball and I have a date tonight because I know that, at least for me, that was not a one night stand.

I mentioned this in the early edition of this blog this morning but it's worth repeating again.  I was goofing off between sets while Drill Sergeant was out puking (I keed Chili, I keed - this time anyway, she was just getting some fresh air) and messing around with some of the medicine balls and found a killer ab exercise that requires no motion at all.  It's a plank variation where you aren't moving but oh my gawd are your ab muscles twitchin' and pingin' off trying to keep you from bouncing your face off the mat (and thank goodness I have mats because I failed a few times). 

My abs still aren't quite healed up from last week's "goof off" but I think they will be healed up enough tonight to at least demonstrate both exercises, briefly.  Tomorrow is ab day too.  Last Friday, I sneezed and thought I was going to cry.  You too can have that wonderful feeling if you do these exercises.  I'm talking about working the abs like most people haven't worked them.  You will need a box (you have your box by now right - Come on! You're a SW Blog reader, you haveto have a box) and a couple of medicine balls.  The box adds a whole 'nuther dimension to working out, quite literally. 

I won't require you to get VFFs but I'm loving working out in mine.  One of the students is going to go get some now.  She likes to work out barefoot but likes the idea of having the traction on her feet.  My Bikilas have great traction.  I can dig in on downward dog like nobody's bidness.   And run trails.  And climb rocks. 

I think I'll be doing some more climbing on Thursday.  What I have eyed up is probably too step for Bailey so she may have to stay behind this time.  She's going to be bummed but I'll try to plan a more dog friendly activity the following day or next week.

Stay tuned.

***

Follow me on Twitter to get updates on when new posts show up on this blog (plus get random thoughts on the life of Success Warrior) and feel free to "friend" me on Facebook.

Success Warrior is an Independent BeachBody Coach for BeachBody.com, a company that offers fitness programs, supplements, and equipment that have absolutely changed my life. 

Have you heard of P90X?  That's BeachBody.  They also have Insanity, Turbo Jam, TurboFire, RevAbs, Brazil Butt Lift, and many more.  They have some of the best exercise programs on the market.  These aren't just DVDs but are complete programs to transform your body.  They also have the hugely popular, and what they call "the most important meal of the day", Shakeology.  Go HERE to learn the most inexpensive way to get Shakeology.

They have equipment and supplements in addition to Shakeology and popular exercise programs.  Visit BeachBody.com and click on the "Shop" link to see everything they offer. 

There is also a business side to all this fitness that you can take advantage of.  Whether you're looking to just make a couple hundred extra dollars in fun money or are looking to take complete financial control of your life, BeachBody can help you get there.  If you have a desire to be more fit and would love to help other people do the same while making some money at it, visit BeachBody.com and click on the "Coach" link.  Team up with me and I'll help you reach your goals, in fitness and finance.

How About a Before Pic?

I did my workout today in my VFF Bikilas to see how they feel.  For what I did, I like them better than shoes.  Now, don't get me wrong.  My UA cross-trainers have been great and are excellent shoes if you're going to hold a resistance band under your feet (which I have done many, many times).  If I was going to do band work, I would probably put the UAs on because they hold the band in place.  It's not pretty when you're at the top of a shoulder press with the band and it comes loose from your feet.  Whap!  In the ass or worse, in the back of the head, and then right on through the ceiling.  I've seen it done a few times and I recommend a shoe that has a very pronounced gap between the ball of the foot and the heel where the band will kind of lock into under tension.

My Bikilas are just so comfortable and that's something that I can't say about the UAs.  I take the UAs off as soon as class is over and not a second longer.  I can wear VFFs all day long and in fact, for the last week, I have done just that cycling between the Classics, Flows, and now the Bikilas. 

I've had a lot of comments over the week ranging from "What are those?" to "I need some of those," to "I could never wear something like that."  I don't wear them to get a reaction from people but I'm also not afraid of getting reactions from people.  I'm one of those "who cares?" kinds of people that just does his own thing, undaunted by what others do.  In that, I consider myself to be lucky because much of what passes for "normal" in today's world is the result of political, corporate, and religious brainwashing.  I'd much rather have people make fun of my shoes than have people think it's normal for me to eat at McDonalds (it's been several years and I will never eat that shit again - in case you wondered). 

I had about 350 more words at this point but apparently the above is the last bit that I saved before continuing writing and then the power went out, completely killing my desktop (I'm on my wife's laptop now).  I am not going to try to recreate yesterday's post with any kind of exactness so this post may take a 90 degree turn at this point.  The good news is that with my posts, that kind of thing would probably go unnoticed if I didn't actually point it out.  So, while there may be a change of thought between the last paragraph and the last, my readers have been trained to expect that from someone with undiagnosed ADD.  I am adding this paragraph more for my own benefit than yours but the power outage and the dead computer will be necessary information for you later in this post.

Soooooooo,

This post is not actually about VFFs, if you can believe that at this point and after the last few.  Yes, I know, I can't believe it either and I'm the author.  Long time readers know me though.  "Look!  Something shiny!"  Right now, even though I have been wearing VFFs for quite a while now, they are still shiny to me, especially with a new pair sitting by my bed and the fact that the Flows are easy to put on now.  This blog is, however, about other areas of fitness too, like, exercise?

I have written up my workout plan for the next 10 weeks, starting on Aug. 30th.  3 of the 10 weeks are Recovery Weeks because I think this might be another tough one.  That's how the last couple of have been, not counting August, which has kind of been a Recovery Month given how much I have been gone.  This month, knowing that I would be MIA much of the time, I planned my weeks around 3 days of exercise and even then, I missed a few. 

The months before that though, I had some tough workouts and I postponed some Recovery Weeks and in the back of my mind, I have a small wonder if that might be part of the reason for my current injury.  Not fully healed but ready to get back into some intense exercise, I am peppering it with Recovery Weeks at normal intervals plus a bonus recovery week after what I'm calling "Hell Week."

Now, to be honest, never have tried this workout, I don't really know how tough it's going to be and I don't know how much hell, "Hell Week" is going to be.  It's all in my imagination at this point.

Annnnnnd,

That's way more than I planned to go into the workout at this point.  I'm going to cover it in more detail in upcoming days.  I'm always willing to share my plans with anyone that wants them.  I'd love to hear some feedback from other people that try it. 

I explained all of that to say that I'm really going to focus on all areas surrounding fitness for the next two months, just to see what happens.  You know, I'm my best guinea pig. 

I'm going to add a little bit of running (yes in my VFF Bikilas - dammit if I can escape the topic!).  I will be able to run in the daylight so I think I'll be taking to the desert.  Running in the daylight will allow me to see well enough to run over the uneven, rock strewn, sage brush speckled, snake infested ground without rolling my ankle.  For new readers, yes, I have had to jump over a snake on one of my runs but I was actually on a walking path at the time.

Helloooooo?  Walking path here.  You have no legs.  Hence no "walking".  That should automatically disqualify a snake from being there, doncha think?

I'm going to be changing my diet to something pretty much Primal for those 10 weeks.  Meat, fruits, and vegetables.  What I used to call my "No White Diet".  No sugar, no bread, no rice, and no pasta.  Now they have a cooler name for it.  Primal. 

I'm going to change my supplementation for those two months too.  This is a complete experiment. 

On top of that, I'm going to be seeing what I can do to change my mindset a bit too.  Changing the inside and outside at the same time.

I have no idea what the outcome is going to be at this point but I thought that I would go old school on this and take a before picture.  I haven't done that since P90X.  I just thought that if I'm going to be doing all of these changes, it would be a good idea to have before and after pictures.  I still think it's a good idea and my wife took the before picture for me  on Wednesday night.  That's the good news.  The bad news is that I have taken it off the camera and put it on my computer, the computer that is dead.  I am hoping that my computer guy is able to revive my computer along with all the data on there (so, so much data) and when that happens, I'll actually post the picture.  If he pronounces the computer dead, I'll have my wife take another picture before I start the new workout.

So, there's the not so brief synopsis, along with no picture, for you.  I will be going into more detail over the next couple of months about what all these pieces look like on closer inspection and how the whole thing is going.

Stay tuned.

Vibram Five Fingers Classic/Flow/Bikila Side by Side plus Injinji Toesox

I had my appointment with physical therapist today. 

An apology to new readers that came solely for the scoop on the VFFs but I tend to mix in journal type stuff with training stuff with my latest injury stuff with disk golf stuff and - well, you get the idea.  Read on.

Today, she concentrated on healing instead of seeking out new and cool ways to hurt me.  She still did a bit of that because we did some trigger point therapy.  By "we", I mean that she did all the work and she told me that my job was to relax and breath.  Tough stuff that.  I guess that some people stop breathing when they get hit with the pain.  I've learned that it's best to breath through the pain so I had no problems with my part of it.  She also did some ultrasound work on my neck and back then showed me a bunch of stretches.  These are some very passive stretches and she warned me half a dozen times not to go too hard on them.  I kid you not.  Half a dozen.  She even apologized for sounding like a broken record.  Do I look like the kind of guy that's going to go too hard?  (Don't answer that)

One of the stretches, I have to lay on my back with a towel rolled up running down the length of my spine with my arms laid out to the sides.  I'm supposed to "hold" this stretch for 5 minutes.  A couple minutes into the stretch, she asked me how I was doing.  "A couple more minutes and I'm going to be asleep," I said.  I mean, these are passive stretches.  I'll have to stay awake on that one though because if you do it too much, it can actually weaken things and I don't need that.

She decided that I was way too comfortable and convinced the doctor to give me about a dozen shots into the neck and back.  Trigger Point Injections.  They burn but they're not that bad.  Last time, I had amazing results with them so I'm hoping for more of the same. 

At one point, the doctor had me turn my head to the right so he could attack the trigger point from the best angle and I saw this rust colored stain on the curtain that was being used to keep me bare back (but not backside) hidden from other people in the physical therapy room. 

"Is that blood spatter?" I asked.

"I hope not," the doctor said.

"Hardly confidence inspiring," I said.

He was too busy to laugh at that but I did get a response out of him when he jabbed down on a trigger point at the base of my neck.

"Right there?" he asked, as my whole body tried to shrink away from the pain.

"Yeah, Dr. Spock, right there," I sad.

"The mind meld is next," he said.

 All of that has tightened up at this point and my wife has threatened to ground me from karate.  I'm going to try to heal in the next 2 hours by some miracle so that I can participate.  I'll still be teaching though, even if I can't get out there and play because my lead student is out on the Salt Flats in an ambulance waiting for people who are traveling at several hundred miles per hour to crash.  He's an EMT and works Speed Week on the ambulance every year.  He also did security work for Johnny Depp when they were out here filming Pirates.  Anyway, I'm in charge of the class today regardless of how my neck and back feel.

I don't know that I have a lot to add about the different Vibram Five Fingers (VFFs) but I thought that I could take a bunch of pictures to better illustrate what I've been talking about.  So, I did just that.

Here are my three pairs off VFFs.  Left to right, they are: Classic, Bikila, and Flow.  I went with basic black on the Flow on purpose.  I tried to get a different color of Classic but they were out of stock and I ended up with black.  This was the only color of Bikila in stock but it works for me.  All of them are a bit more flashy, which is normal for running shoes.  The Bikila also has patches of reflective material so that drivers will swerve toward me to try and figure out what the hell those glowing bits in the dark are.

 
Here's a closer look at the Flow, since the blackness seemed to make everything blend together in the last picture.  Notice that there is extra protection over the big toe already so maybe I won't have to do a patch job on them in the future like I did with my Classics.  All three have different ways to keep the shoes on.  These have a velcro strap over the top and another one around the back.  The Bikilas have a single velcro strap over the top.  The Classics have a simple elastic around opening that can be tightened with a clip at the back (but I never tighten mine).

 
Yesterday, I said that the biggest different between the Bikila and the Classic was that there was more to the Bikila.  Half of that can be seen here.  The Bikila covers much more of my feet, the rubber is a bit thicker, and there the velcro strap that keeps the shoe firmly in place.

 
The other half of that is the bottom of the shoe where the surface is broken up into pieces of thicker rubber.  One thing that my brother and I have noticed about the Classics is that walking on the cement gets old after a while.  I wonder if the tad thicker padding will help if I'm running on cement.  I can always run in the desert but that's dangerous if I have to run in the dark because the ground is so uneven and full of pitfalls (and scorpions and rattlesnakes).  My running times this fall will probably be during daylight hours so I may be able to do some desert running and some hills.  I'm still going to try pavement with the Bikila just to see how it feels but I'll try desert too.  The Classics actually don't work great in the desert because the sand and rocks end up in the very large opening of the shoe and then inside the shoe.  I have to stop and empty them out often.  The elastic higher up on the foot with the Bikila might stop much of that. 

 
I tried on my new Injinji toesox today.  They were easier to put on than I thought they were going to be and were very comfortable.  I haven't tried them with the Flow over the top of them yet.  I'm concerned that there isn't going to be enough room inside the toes of the Flows for the addition of socks.  It's going to be a tight fit.  At least the socks are comfortable so the next time I wear the Flows, I'll try them as a combo and report how it goes.

I think that I will be using my Bikilas for my morning workouts too, at least until the Komodo comes out.  I think the Five Finger design will make this possible where I would never do this with a pair of actual running shoes.  As always, I'll let you know how that goes.  The first test will probably be tomorrow morning.  We are still waiting to hear when my wife has to report to the hospital but if there is time for my workout, I'll be rockin' it in my Bikilas.

***

Follow me on Twitter to get updates on when new posts show up on this blog (plus get random thoughts on the life of Success Warrior) and feel free to "friend" me on Facebook.

Success Warrior is an Independent BeachBody Coach for BeachBody.com, a company that offers fitness programs, supplements, and equipment that have absolutely changed my life. 

Have you heard of P90X?  That's BeachBody.  They also have Insanity, Turbo Jam, TurboFire, RevAbs, Brazil Butt Lift, and many more.  They have some of the best exercise programs on the market.  These aren't just DVDs but are complete programs to transform your body.  They also have the hugely popular, and what they call "the most important meal of the day", Shakeology.  Go HERE to learn the most inexpensive way to get Shakeology.

They have equipment and supplements in addition to Shakeology and popular exercise programs.  Visit BeachBody.com and click on the "Shop" link to see everything they offer. 

There is also a business side to all this fitness that you can take advantage of.  Whether you're looking to just make a couple hundred extra dollars in fun money or are looking to take complete financial control of your life, BeachBody can help you get there.  If you have a desire to be more fit and would love to help other people do the same while making some money at it, visit BeachBody.com and click on the "Coach" link.  Team up with me and I'll help you reach your goals, in fitness and finance.

Roughing It

I'm taking one for the team to write this blog post for you under the current conditions.  Check out my Facebook or Twitter profile for a picture.

One of the things that I like about our get-aways up here by Yellowstone is that there is usually some downtime for reflection.  That hasn't really been the case this time as it seems that just about every minute has been spoken for.  Things have finally slowed down and sadly, it's our last day here.  Then we have to return the desert and our broken air conditioner. 

I'm going to have to do some kind of diet detox when I get home.  I can say that without any need for reflection.  I have been eating s'mores and anything else that came my way. 

I called for a follow up with my doctor today.  Oct 12.  Nice.  I think that the trigger point stuff they did last time is on the right track and now I need to see if I can talk them into doing it where it hurts the most.  I should have been more on the ball at the time but I wasn't convinced they what they did was going to help since it seemed to make everything hurt more instead of less.  Now, a week later, where they did the injections feels better.  Not just kind of better but *better*.  If I can get that kind of relief on my back, I'm going to be able to turn and burn on my program.  That would be cool because I have a new plan for the next couple of months.

It's going to be a combination of heavy stuff (considering the class format) and intervals.  Not on the same day but alternating through the weeks, with a couple of recovery weeks, and a hell week.  I have the picture in my head but I haven't written the plan down yet.  I'm thinking about keeping the extercises to only 4 per day so we'll have to stick with some of the basics (push ups, rows, squats, etc.).  I won't be doing anything fancy for the next couple of months or doing funky combinations like I did for this month or last month.  Solid basics, done heavy on some days, and then done for intervals on other days. 

It's going to be draining so that makes me think that I better be serious about doing a diet reboot in the next couple of weeks.  Maybe I'll drop the carbs low for 10 days and then add the fruits and vegetables back in and stay strict Primal for those two months, at least as far as food goes.  I'll probably add glutamine back in to my supplementation for those two months to help with recovery.  If it goes anything like the movie in my mind, I'm going to need all the help that I can get.

I got my hot pink GymBoss timer.  I'll be using that for the interval days because I won't have time to look at the clock.  It's going to be "go, go, go," and then take a super short break.  Then go again, and so on, until I collapse into a pool of my own drool and sweat.  It's not going to be pretty.

I have an appointment with my physical therapist on Wednesday.  I hope she can help get the muscle situation figured out because I'm not going to be holding back or waiting for Oct. 12th or anything.  Oct. 12th is like a lifetime away and I'm glad that I don't have anything life threatening.  I asked for the earliest appointment possible and this is what I was given.  I'm not putting my life or fitness plan on hold any more waiting around for the doctors to figure it out.  Nothing *I* do makes it better or worse so I'm just going to go for it.

I think I'm going to do a bit of running too, at least until it gets too cold for me.  Trey starts school in a week and that will allow me to go and do a bit of running on a few days.  Nothing too far and nothing too fast.  I know that running isn't necessarily Primal but I enjoy it and I'll be going slow speed so it might still count if it's more of a lope.  I'm going to be looking into the VFF Bikila too.  If I'm running in those, it's going to be a different world so I'll be teaching myself how to run again.  That will automatically slow down the pace and the mileage. 

I am hoping to get a treadmill this winter so that I can keep running even when it gets too cold for me (which isn't really that cold since I hate having to put on layers to go run).  The upside to that is that I could keep running next summer when Trey is home from school.  Although, next year, he might be old enough to keep up on a bicycle.  That would be a great thing.

I'm hoping that he'll be old enough to start playing disk golf soon.  Tia was talking about learning too so that we could go as a family.  With a bit of practice, anyone can throw a Frisbee.  I was teaching them both how to throw a disk a couple of weeks ago because it's a little different than throwing a Frisbee.  Trey was doing pretty good yesterday when we were throwing them at the practice basket. 

Now, Tia is going for a ride with her mom and Trey is going to have a nap so I'm going to get a little private practice on the disk golf basket before I have to put it away.  We are leaving first thing in the morning so I will start the packing process tonight.  That means the basket will have to broken down and boxed up tonight.  So, while everyone else is busy doing their own thing, I'm going to put on my iPod, jam some tunes, and throw some disks.  I'm working on improving my putting so that I can attack the basket from farther away.  Right now, I'm prone to lay it up and take the gimme rather than risk overshooting the basket.  I should get to the point where I can confidently put in anything that misses, especially if I ever want to get to the point where I can play a sub-par game (which just doesn't sound right at all).

Speaking of which, my Vibram Ridge disk golf disk should be at home when I get there, or at the post office rather.  If we get home before the post office closes, I should have a new disk in my hand tomorrow.  How cool is that!

Enough rambling.  Time to go throw some disks.

"Procedure #2": In Layman's Terms

Yesterday, I had another fun procedure on my neck and once again, I'm going to help you recreate this at home.  Just like I did with the first procedure.

So, here we go.  For this procedure, you will need:

• Wedge Love Pillow
• Extra Pillow
• A Hollow Railroad Spike
• Straws that bend like the ones we got as kids
• A car battery and jumper cables
• A bottle of tequila and a shot glass
• A couple Naproxen
• A Sharpie
• A Safety Pin
• Don't forget the sadistic friend, that while not afraid to inflict pain on you, will also jump in to do CPR if needed
• One more sadistic friend that has watched too many episodes of Gumby as a kid.

Okay, I'll admit that I'm not sure where you're going to get a hollow railroad spike.  Doctor's have the luxury of having extra-special equipment made for them.  Maybe you could take a piece of electrical metallic tubing and cut it an angle to make it sharp.  You're bright people.  Improvise!

Let's get started.

Meet with your Gumby-watching friend first.  This friend is going to take your arm and bend it, pull it, push it, and twist it, in as many different directions as possible (some that you didn't even know existed) with the sole purpose of causing you pain.  She will do it to both sides so that you have a baseline to go from so that you can really feel how much your other shoulder hurts.  After about 30 minutes of this fun, she's going to go to your other sadistic friend and suggest that he stab you many more times than was planned.

Now meet with that other friend after he's gotten the extra stabbing advice.  He's going to have you sit down facing away from him while he pokes his finger deep into your muscles with the sole purpose of causing pain, the more intense the better.  When he finds the intensely painful spots, he's going to mark them with a sharpie.

When he has found at least 4 "good" spots, he is going to take the safety pin out and slowly push it into your muscles.  Your job is to wait until he gets to the right depth and then let him know he has found the spot.  He will actually be able to tell because you'll flinch and curse but you're supposed to tell him anyway.

When he's done, he'll give you a 10 minute break and then come back to see how you're doing.  If you aren't feeling better, it's off to the kitchen counter.

This time, he'll be a bit nicer and offer some padding.  You get to rest your chest on the Love Pillow and he'll give you an extra pillow for your bidness because mashing your junk on a kitchen counter is very uncomfortable.  Ummm, that's what I heard anyway.

Have your friend set the bottle of tequila and the shot glass on the counter.

Have your friend hook the jumper cables to the battery.

Lay face down on your pillows.  No, you don't get any of the tequila.  Sorry.

Your friend will now take the railroad spike and press it into your back between C6 and C7.  To actually get the spike to fit between the vertebrae, he's going to have to really press down hard to the point where he is tip-toeing to get all of his weight on top of the spike.  "Sorry for the pressure," he'll say as his feet actually leave the ground, like he's practicing for the Circue de Soleil.  He might end up in a one handed hand-stand, balanced on the spike in your neck twirling a hoop with his free hand for all you know.  You won't be able to tell because your face is going to be mashed into the kitchen counter.

Once the spike has been put into place, he's going to get the bendy straw so he can feed it into the hollow spike.  Before he puts the straw in the tube though, he's going to warn you that you might feel a "slight electrical feeling."  He will then feed the straw into the tube that has wedged apart C6 and C7 and try to slide the straw up your spinal column so that it's up between C5 and C6.

At this point, he is going to very, very gently, so as to not hurt you, touch the jumper cables ever so briefly to your nutsack.

When your body lands back on the kitchen counter after violently launching into the air, he'll ask, "Electrical feeling?" and you'll remember that it's probably not best to move at all when there is a spike separating your vertebrae and a straw resting on your spinal column.

What you want to answer is, "Slight electrical feeling, my ass!  You just shocked my balls and I felt it all the way down to the tips of my big toes!  Have you ever had this done to you?  Does the text book say, "Warn the patient that they will feel a 'slight electrical feeling'?  You might want to highlight that and make a note in the margin that says, 'Warn your patient that you're about to tase him bro but you should probably leave out that you're going to tase him in the balls as this might make him nervous.'"

What you actually say is "Uh-huh."  Don't piss off the guy with the spike in your neck by being a smart ass to his face and hope that he doesn't ever find your blog either.

Once you settle back down from being shocked, your friend will put a couple of drops of tequila in the straw.  If you stop breathing, he did it wrong.

If you don't stop breathing, he drop a couple of crushed up Naproxen into the straw, washed down with a tad bit more tequila.  Not too much tequila though or your lungs will stop working.

With that done, your friend will pull the railroad spike out from between your vertebrae.  At least, he'll try.  He'll have to put some good effort into it.  By "good effort," I mean that he will climb onto the counter with you and put one foot on your head and one foot on your back so that he can get some good leverage on the spike.  With one final grunt, the spike will come out, and your vertebrae will snap back into place with an audible pop.

And you're done.

Easy peasy lemon squeezey.

***

Follow me on Twitter to get updates on when new posts show up on this blog (plus get random thoughts on the life of Success Warrior) and feel free to "friend" me on Facebook.

Success Warrior is an Independent BeachBody Coach for BeachBody.com, a company that offers fitness programs, supplements, and equipment that have absolutely changed my life. 

Have you heard of P90X?  That's BeachBody.  They also have Insanity, Turbo Jam, TurboFire, RevAbs, Brazil Butt Lift, and many more.  They have some of the best exercise programs on the market.  These aren't just DVDs but are complete programs to transform your body.  They also have the hugely popular, and what they call "the most important meal of the day", Shakeology.  Go HERE to learn the most inexpensive way to get Shakeology.

They have equipment and supplements in addition to Shakeology and popular exercise programs.  Visit BeachBody.com and click on the "Shop" link to see everything they offer. 

There is also a business side to all this fitness that you can take advantage of.  Whether you're looking to just make a couple hundred extra dollars in fun money or are looking to take complete financial control of your life, BeachBody can help you get there.  If you have a desire to be more fit and would love to help other people do the same while making some money at it, visit BeachBody.com and click on the "Coach" link.  Team up with me and I'll help you reach your goals, in fitness and finance.

Fasting

Today is going to be kind of a busy day because, well because we live where we live so we try to lump as much stuff together as we can when we go to town.  Once we travel across the salt flats, we do everything we can because we want to make as few of these trips as we can.

I'm having my last drink of clear liquids until dinner.  I probably drink a couple of gallons of water a day so the no drinking part of fasting is the hardest.  Last time, I ended up with a couple of dizzy spells the next day that the nurse thinks was probably caused by dehydration.  I'm going to try drinking more water after the procedure today than I did last time.  The thing is, I really didn't feel like drinking much after the last procedure.  Today, I'll buy a large water for the drive back across the desert because if it's there, I will probably sip on it all the way home.

So here's what our day is going to look like.  (I'm writing this at 5 in the morning because it's the only chance I'll get probably.)

Wake up early.  Early enough to write a blog post and respond to any email that has come in.  Early enough to get a drink.  I can only have clear liquids to drink since dinner last night and can't have anything to drink after 6am this morning.  Last time, I didn't wake up until 6am so I missed my last chance at a drink.  I am not making that mistake today.

Respond to email and write an anticipatory blog post.

Get everyone ready for the trip.  I fueled up the Hummingbird last night so we could just head on out of town this morning.  I'll help Trey get hooked up with his DVD player and his Nintendo DS.  It's going to be a long day for a 6 year old.

Drive across the desert and go to the first hospital along the way so Tia can have a CT scan.  I'm not the only one that's having a body malfunction at the moment.  She was able to get her appointment on the same day as mine and early enough that we have time to get from one medical facility to another with a bit of time to spare in between.

We are going to use that bit of time in between to do some school shopping for Trey.  He's growing so fast that he needs new clothes every six months.  We have written up a list of exactly what he needs, right down to the number of new underwear to get so that this will be a very clear, mission oriented, shopping experience. 

Socks?  Check.

Pants (trousers for my English readers)?  Check.

Long sleeve shirts?  Check.

Underwear?  Check.

He gets the coolest underwear.  Last time, he got The Hulk underwear.  I was jealous.  How cool would it be to go around saying that you had The Hulk in your pants?  I'm going to see if they make them in my size.  What size is that?  Hulk size.  =)

From there, we head up to the physical therapist.  She's supposed to teach me some stretches and exercises to help work the kinks out of my back.  The muscles on the left side of my back are responding to the nerve problem by tightening up to the point of being painful.  The doctors think that my back muscles may have taken on a life of their own and even if we figure out the nerve thing, the back pain might persist out of habit.  So I'm going to learn some things to help make sure that the muscles are working correctly and responding to what's actually happening.

After that, I getto experience the joy of being stabbed in the neck again.  This is in the same building so there isn't any travel time other than walking down a hallway.  When I was making my appointments, I asked them to try and schedule them on the same day.  Not only was the receptionist able to do that, she was able to get them so that the ending time of physical therapy and the beginning time of stabbing was only 20 minutes apart.  This timing is what is going to allow us to do everything listed above and is going to help a little bit for Trey.  A little bit.

Last time, from the time we arrived for the procedure until the time we left was 3 hours.  We'll have to make sure the DS is fully charged before we get there.

After that, it's going to be dinner time and the start of rehydration.

Then the trip back across the desert.

From there, it probably won't be too long before it's time for bed.

And that's what the day looks like from here.

Tomorrow, I'll tell you how it all went.  Get a shot glass and some tequila, just in case.

***

Follow me on Twitter to get updates on when new posts show up on this blog (plus get random thoughts on the life of Success Warrior) and feel free to "friend" me on Facebook.

Success Warrior is an Independent BeachBody Coach for BeachBody.com, a company that offers fitness programs, supplements, and equipment that have absolutely changed my life. 

Have you heard of P90X?  That's BeachBody.  They also have Insanity, Turbo Jam, TurboFire, RevAbs, Brazil Butt Lift, and many more.  They have some of the best exercise programs on the market.  These aren't just DVDs but are complete programs to transform your body.  They also have the hugely popular, and what they call "the most important meal of the day", Shakeology.  Go HERE to learn the most inexpensive way to get Shakeology.

They have equipment and supplements in addition to Shakeology and popular exercise programs.  Visit BeachBody.com and click on the "Shop" link to see everything they offer. 

There is also a business side to all this fitness that you can take advantage of.  Whether you're looking to just make a couple hundred extra dollars in fun money or are looking to take complete financial control of your life, BeachBody can help you get there.  If you have a desire to be more fit and would love to help other people do the same while making some money at it, visit BeachBody.com and click on the "Coach" link.  Team up with me and I'll help you reach your goals, in fitness and finance.

I Ordered Toe Socks

There.  I said it.

<rant>

This morning, the doctor's office called me to remind me of my appointment tomorrow and also remind me not to eat anything after dinner tonight and not to drink anything after 6am tomorrow morning.

Roger that.

Later this morning, someone else from the doctor's office called to remind me that I'm meeting with the physical therapist tomorrow.

Roger that.

This afternoon, someone besides the first two people called to tell me that my insurance company had declined authorization of the procedure so my appointment was cancelled.

Lovely.

Of course, I immediately called my wife because she's The Fixer.

I was declined for two reasons.

1.  The doctor's office doesn't have the test results from my MRI.  If you haven't been following this blog long, you might want to check out the back story   to fully appreciate this rant (and long time readers might want to glance at it as a refresher). 

The short version goes something like this:  When I initially tried to make an appointment with this doctor, they said that I wasn't allowed to until they got the test results from my primary physician.  I had to put my wife on that job too but she made it happen and I was able to make an appointment.  I've been there twice now and this would have been my third visit.

All of that to say, they have the damn test results or at least they did at one point.  My primary doctor has my test results.  My neurosurgeon has a copy of the test results.  I have a copy of my test results.  *You* could probably google "Success Warrior + MRI test results" and get them, for hell's sake.

2.  The second reason that they are denying it is because the first treatment wasn't at least 50% effective. 

Hellooooooo? 

The reason that I'm letting the doctors stab me in the neck again is because the first time didn't work.  That's the point.  This is a different procedure that is supposed to do what the first procedure didn't do. 

But apparently my insurance company knows more about neuroscience than my plethora of doctors.

So, if they don't authorize this treatment and things don't change for the better by magic, I'll be taking my handfuls of pills until my liver craps out on me.  I wonder if the insurance company covers that.

</rant>

On a super cool note, I received a phone call today that made my day.  When I was a cop, there was this kid that was kind of taken under the whole department's wing.  We let him hang out at the PD and took him for rides in the cars.  Well, he grew up, lost his brain, and has decided to become a cop.  He found me on the Internets (Thanks Al Gore!) and asked for some help preparing for the physical test he's going to have to take to be accepted into the police academy.

So, I worked up a plan for him and he started it a little over a week ago.  He's supposed to email me, at the very least, every Sunday to let me know how things are going so I can tweak the plan and keep him on track.  Sunday came and went and I didn't hear from him.  Monday, I sent him an email reminding him that he's supposed to keep me in the loop (part of my job in these situations is being the kick in the ass guy to make sure people are moving forward).  Still nothing.

Today, he called to tell me that his email won't send for some reason (Damn you Al Gore!) so he was calling with the update.

He lost 6 pounds in the first week, says he feels better in general, and said that he's sleeping better too.  Bonus!

Here's the thing about Utah's police test.  It's designed for lean people.  Our job here is to make him stronger and faster than he currently is but much smaller.  Every single one of the tests is easier, the lighter you are and the smaller your gut is.  Stronger can't come at the price of bigger muscles, just stronger muscles.

We have under 3 months to turn him into a lean, mean, PT machine.

His phone call was the bright spot in the middle of all the other phone calls.  He's doing great.  I made it clear that I would design a plan for him but it was up to him to do the work.  It sounds like he's doing the work and that's great.

So, back to the toe socks. 

I warned you guys that I was going to be buying them so don't act shocked.  Remember, I have the cold weather Vibrams, the VFF Flow.  Also remember that while they do keep my feet warm, they don't keep my ankles warm.  So, I bought one pair of Injinji Toesox  to see how they would perform being worn inside my VFFs.  I'll keep you updated, of course.  I'm really hoping that they are comfortable so that I can wear my VFFs in the cold.

Yes, I know Rick.  I'm a puss when it comes to the cold.  I have accepted it.

Update: You knew this was going to happen.  My appointment for tomorrow is back on.  My wife just called me to let me know.  I told her that I fully expected that outcome with her on the case.  She said it wasn't really that difficult this time.  Whatever.

So, I'll be making some dinner soon and that will be my last meal until dinner tomorrow night.

Think of me and wish me well while you are eating breakfast tomorrow.

***

Follow me on Twitter to get updates on when new posts show up on this blog (plus get random thoughts on the life of Success Warrior) and feel free to "friend" me on Facebook.

Success Warrior is an Independent BeachBody Coach for BeachBody.com, a company that offers fitness programs, supplements, and equipment that have absolutely changed my life. 

Have you heard of P90X?  That's BeachBody.  They also have Insanity, Turbo Jam, TurboFire, RevAbs, Brazil Butt Lift, and many more.  They have some of the best exercise programs on the market.  These aren't just DVDs but are complete programs to transform your body.  They also have the hugely popular, and what they call "the most important meal of the day", Shakeology.  Go HERE to learn the most inexpensive way to get Shakeology.

They have equipment and supplements in addition to Shakeology and popular exercise programs.  Visit BeachBody.com and click on the "Shop" link to see everything they offer. 

There is also a business side to all this fitness that you can take advantage of.  Whether you're looking to just make a couple hundred extra dollars in fun money or are looking to take complete financial control of your life, BeachBody can help you get there.  If you have a desire to be more fit and would love to help other people do the same while making some money at it, visit BeachBody.com and click on the "Coach" link.  Team up with me and I'll help you reach your goals, in fitness and finance.

Getting Close to Vacation

I'm going to be taking a week off from work and I can tell you that I am quite ready for it.  We're are going to be heading for a cooler climate with tons of trees.  I'm going to be taking a book and my portable disk golf basket so I can just relax for a bit.

I am going back to the doctor on Wednesday for another jab in the neck.  Yay.  This time they are going to go in from the back and attack it in a different way.  "The shotgun approach" is the way the doctor explained it.  Hmmm, a shotgun on a spinal column.  Lovely.

I am hoping that it works though.  The last one that they did actually made things worse and I have finally recovered from that bit of fun.  I'm back down to the level of pain that I was at before I went to the doctor.  Isn't that a sad bit of information.  I have finally healed up from what they did to me and the problem that I went in to have fixed seems "fine" compared to what they did to me. 

The good news is that this procedure is less dangerous than the last one.  I can be happy about that.

It would be really cool if it did something nice for me and I had even less pain for my vacation. 

I'm going to be trying to fix up my Vibram Five Fingers today from the disk golf damage.  You know I'll be taking them on my vacation.  They are absolutely the best driving shoes around.  So comfy for a long trip. 

Short post today because it's Sunday.  I was going to do the usual 7 Words post for today but all of this wouldn't fit in 7 Words except maybe in summation.

Hoping to relax, pain-free on my vacation.

Leave your seven words in the comments.

***

Follow me on Twitter to get updates on when new posts show up on this blog (plus get random thoughts on the life of Success Warrior) and feel free to "friend" me on Facebook.

Success Warrior is an Independent BeachBody Coach for BeachBody.com, a company that offers fitness programs, supplements, and equipment that have absolutely changed my life. 

Have you heard of P90X?  That's BeachBody.  They also have Insanity, Turbo Jam, TurboFire, RevAbs, Brazil Butt Lift, and many more.  They have some of the best exercise programs on the market.  These aren't just DVDs but are complete programs to transform your body.  They also have the hugely popular, and what they call "the most important meal of the day", Shakeology.  Go HERE to learn the most inexpensive way to get Shakeology.

They have equipment and supplements in addition to Shakeology and popular exercise programs.  Visit BeachBody.com and click on the "Shop" link to see everything they offer. 

There is also a business side to all this fitness that you can take advantage of.  Whether you're looking to just make a couple hundred extra dollars in fun money or are looking to take complete financial control of your life, BeachBody can help you get there.  If you have a desire to be more fit and would love to help other people do the same while making some money at it, visit BeachBody.com and click on the "Coach" link.  Team up with me and I'll help you reach your goals, in fitness and finance.