Got Milk?
So,
Today I decided to wander around the health areas on the Internets. After all, in case you have forgotten, this blog is about health.
It is?
Shhhh.
People that live further away from the equator have a greater chance developing multiple sclerosis.
All praise Ra!
Amen!
Researchers have tossed around a bunch of ideas for what causes MS but now they believe that there may be a link between lack of sunlight and the development of the disease. Vitamin D, it does a body good.
Get yer ass into the sun!
And take Vitamin D in the winter (for those of us away from the equator).
Quite opposite of milk, it seems that people that drink diet soda are more likely to have strokes and heart attacks. At the moment, researchers don't know if it's actually the diet sodas that are doing the damage or if people that drink diet soda are doing other unhealthy things to their bodies.
Flipping that, the same thing has been said about multi-vitamins. Some researchers say that multi-vitamins are a waste of money but people that take them are healthier. Is it the multi-vitamins or do people who take them just do other healthy things where they are getting the healthful benefits? I don't know the answer so I just keep on taking multi-vitamins. For those that are interested, I take Controlled Labs Orange Triad
.
Like they care.
I know but some people do ask.
Scientists have come up with a strategy to counteract the effects of diet soda, just in case it is actually the diet soda that is causing or contributing to the increase in strokes and heart attacks.
"A simple solution, health experts say, is to drink water instead."
Brilliant!
Right?
It seems like it's rare that I agree with researchers in these articles but this time, I'm going to have to go along with them. Expose your skin to sun, don't drink diet soda, and drink water. Everyone keeping track?
You know they are just waiting for you to talk about sex.
<sigh> I know.
Fort Wayne, Indiana is opening up a new government center and they have asked the citizens to submit suggestions for the name of the new center. The people have spoken and they want to name the center after a popular four-term mayor, now deceased, Harry Baals (pronounced Balls). The people want it to be called the "Harry Baals City Center". Seems appropriate doesn't it?
Why? Was "Anal Rash City Center" already taken?
The article didn't say.
6,000 people voted and 5,400 of them voted for the name Harry Baals. And, true to any good democratic government lately, that name will not be picked.
Ya hafta love the will of the people.
It's like all the pretending is gone.
Speaking of impotence and government, Turkey is considering chemical castration for sex offenders. Inmates would be given drugs that reduce the amount of testosterone in their bodies and thereby, the hope is, reduce their sexual drive while they are in therapy. But that's not all, if you act now, you also get this. Tell 'em what they get Harry.
"The legislation also aims to discourage a generations-old tradition that forces female rape victims to marry their attackers in the belief that would save their honor."
Who knew that rape could be considering "courting".
"Freaky" doesn't even cover this.
Do you think it matters if it's forcible rape?
Is there any other kind?
You'll have to ask your friendly, neighborhood Republican congressperson.
I think I'd rather be chemically castrated at the Harry Balls penal correction facility.
I read an article about six reasons to have sex.
Did you need any more reason than the fact that it's sex?
Hush.
Having an orgasm a couple of times a week can do all of the following:
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Make you look younger. Especially when the lights are off. Amazing innit?
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Help you lose weight. How much does sperm weigh, anyway? Are you going to comment on all of these?
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Power up the immune system and reduce the occurrence of colds. Incentive program. It's hard to get laid when you have snot bubbles coming out your nose. So stay healthy if you want to get laid. Thanks for that scientific fact, Mr. Wizard. How did you know the nickname I gave my penis?
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Reduce stress. Especially the stress that builds up from not getting laid. True dat.
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Reduce the chance of heart disease, especially for those lucky souls that orgasm 3 or more times a week. Sex increases arterial dilation. Yeah, especially near your hairy balls. You're seriously messed up, you know that, right?
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Help you live longer. Duh! You'll want to live longer so you can have more sex but if you ain't getting it, you pretty much want to die.
"So forget about an apple a day. To feel healthier, look younger, and live longer, an orgasm or two a week may be an effective -- and certainly enjoyable -- remedy."
Don't automatically write off the fruit though.
To eat or to be used during sex.
Yes.
Thought so.
To sum up what we've learned from today's articles: sunlight is wonderful, diet sodas suck hairy balls, democracies only work if the subjects vote for what the rulers were going to do anyway, make water your primary beverage, don't get raped in Turkey unless you're trying to find yourself a husband, and get laid several times a week (but not necessarily in Turkey).
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