Chronicles: Alan B. Rowley II - Success Warrior - ECoach - P90X

Treying with Words

Poor Trey has to live with the fact that his dad loves to mess around with words and unfortunately "Trey" is easy prey for word play (and rhymes apparently).

He's growing up fast.  I remember holding him nearly non-stop for the first two days of his life in the crook of my arm.  Visitors would come in and ask if they could hold him and I would tell them no.  Now, even if I can get him to sit still, it takes two arms and a lap to even attempt to hold him.  Sometimes to tease him, I would pick him up and rock him and call him my baby boy.

"I'm not a baby.  I'm a Trey.  I'm a big boy," he would say.

"Fine, but you'll always be my Trey-bee boy."

Now, his mom calls him Trey-bee all the time.  Poor kid.

He did get back at us the other day.  We were in the car listening to the radio and Britney Spears' song If You Seek Amy came on and Trey was singing along.

Love me, hate me
Say what you want about me
but all the girls and all the boys want to
If (F) you (U) seek (CK) Amy (me)

He got back at her because she doesn't think it's appropriate for a 4 year old to be singing lyrics like this.  He got back at me because apparently I'm to blame for this corruption.  In my defense, I did point out that he's not going to be 4 for much longer.  His birthday is in two weeks and he'll be five.  It's like when you can see the speed limit sign ahead for a faster speed and you start to accelerate so you're going that speed exactly when you get to the sign.  She countered that she didn't think it was right for a 5 year old either.  I'm still working on my counter to that counter.

Speaking of which, Trey's preschool graduation is on his birthday, or as he refers to it, his Gladulations.

I'm thinking that's a tri-word (or do I dare say a Trey-word?) combo for "Congratulations, I'm Glad you're Graduating."  He says it every time and has no idea how cute we think he is when he does.  Parents are weird, you know.

Had to pass this on

I've been telling everyone around me that there is no chance that I was going to catch Swine Flu because I hadn't kissed any pigs lately.  Swine flu is like mono, it's the kissing disease of pigs.

I came across this picture today and just had to pass it on.

For a less light-hearted look at swine flu, check out my new blog Questionable Politics and give me your feedback.

Today's Health Post: Laughter, the Best Medicine

How to get a six pack in a little over a minute

I've been using plenty of pics this week featuring abs. I came across this great training video on how to get a six pack and I thought I better share.

My New Foot Fetish

  That's not where I would hang the mistletoe.

Trey and I were getting our hair cut yesterday when the haircutter noticed my dry cough.  Noticed is nice.  Lucky I didn't get my ear cut off would be closer to the truth.

"Does it get worse when you lay down?" she asked.

"Why yes it does," I answered.

"Have you heard of putting Vicks on your feet?" she asked.

"Not for medical reasons," I answered.

So I went home and checked the Internets for this new strangeness and it turns out that people do indeed put Vicks on their feet.

I hadn't slept for a couple of days so I thought I would try it out for a nap.  It worked great - for Trey.  He never naps anymore.  He is usually pinging off the ceiling during "quiet time".  I put Vicks on my feet and he had a 3 hour nap.  Probably just what he needed to help him get feeling better.

Me?  I couldn't sleep because I was coughing too much.

I remember reading about straight shooting honey to soothe a scratchy throat.  I decided to give that a try.  Still hacking too much to sleep.  Then I had an asymphony (you know, when the light bulb comes on over your head - must have happened a lot to great composers).

I took my socks back off and slathered my feet with honey.  If it works for Vicks, it might just work for honey.  I put my socks back on, which is as hard as you would imagine.  I laid down for one more try at sleep.

Guess what?  It worked.

But I had the weirdest dream.  I dreamed that I was a bee and that I was going from flower to flower collecting pollen with my feet.  I carried it back to the hive where it was used to make honey.  Unfortunately, all the honey from that batch tasted like Vicks and sweaty feet.

I woke up coughing again.

Fitness Made Difficult

Advanced Training: Success Warrior's NPC workout

I'm going to be making an exclusive offer for readers of this blog.  I'll be releasing a DVD and workbook for a new workout and readers will be able to buy it before the general release and they'll get it at a discounted price.  It's my way of thanking you for visiting my blog.

It is an advanced workout so I would highly recommend that you finish at least one time through P90X or have worked your way up to the Original Turbulence Training program before starting my workout. 

Alternatively, you could order it and try it and just take it at a very easy pace to start off with and work your way up in duration and intensity until you have mastered the workout.

This program combines many of the most popular training programs out today into one fun-filled workout.  You get High Intensity Interval Training (HIIT), strength training, flexibility, balance, and there's even some plyometrics thrown in for good measure.

I can say with absolute certainty that you will sweat like you've never sweat before and yet, it won't even feel like you're working out.  Gone will be the days of dreading your next exercise session.  You'll find yourself looking forward to the next workout almost as soon as you've completed one.  I do recommend taking at least one day off in between workouts, keeping them to a maximum of 3 to 4 a week, because you have to let your body recover from the exertion.

You're also going to want to follow good diet guidelines.  Take a multivitamin, drink the P90X recovery drink after a session, eat lean protein, and plenty of raw fruits and vegetables.  You will need to keep your water intake high and make sure you're getting enough sleep at night.  The training is rigorous and you're going to need to fuel your body for peak performance.

The basic format is similar to other interval training workouts.  You're going to warm up for a few minutes because the last thing that I want is for you to get hurt (and you can definitely get hurt doing the NPC workout so please be careful).  After the warm up, you'll take the intensity up a bit for a minute, then bring it back down for a minute.  You'll bump it up even higher for minute.  This time, when you bring it back down, you'll switch so that you're working different muscles or in a different fashion.  You'll switch between pure cardio, strength, balance, and flexibility.  If you're feeling up to you, you can go for the bonus plyometric circuit.  It's three minutes (one minute each of low, medium, and high intensity) that you'll never forget.  You'll bring it all to a peak of exertion and then follow it up with a short cool down session.

You won't need any special equipment to get started.  I will be releasing a line of SW Products that can be used to add a little variety to the workout or change angles so that you're working different muscles but to begin, all you're going to need is a willing attitude.

And a workout partner.

In order to achieve optimum results with the NPC workout, you're going to have to have a workout buddy.  Someone who has the same goals as you and the same willingness to sweat and have fun.

Check back often for the official release of Success Warrior's Naked Partner Calisthenics workout.  This offer will not be offered in stores. 

Answering email quickly

My inbox is full of email from people who probably expect an answer from me, sooner or later.  Sigourney Weaver hasn't shown up yet and the Alien in my stomach is extremely resilient to bismuth.  It might be slowly working like Kryptonite laced with nicotine but until the good alien and bad alien duke it out in the junk yard of my stomach, I'll keep praying to Fed for relief.

What I've decided to do is answer all the email in one blog post to save time.  I won't post the names here because some people might be embarrassed by their questions.  Those of you that have sent email should be able to pick your answers out.  Let's get started.

No, I don't need any repl1ca watches, thanks.

Yes, by all means, forward that on to me and I'll have a look.

Really, you're that flexible.  I'm going to have to talk to my wife about that one.  Gotta luv Yoga.

No thanks on the watches.

Have you talked to your doctor about that.  That doesn't sound right to me. 

I'd love to.  Thanks for the invite.

Still no to the watches.

Yeah, that was funny.  Can I use it in my blog?  I'll substitute PTE Rick's name into the story so that you don't look stoopid.

More scramble?  I thought you had learned your lesson by now.  =)

Yeah, the whole book will have to be changed right from the start.  In the beginning Fed created the heaven and the earth.

Sure, give me a fake r0lex if it'll get you to quit sending me email.

I'm not sure that will work.  Yeah, it counts as burning calories but how many are you burning in those few minutes.  You might want to try jogging or something.

Calories in versus calories out.  It's simple but it's not always easy.

Dude!  No way!  Is there a pool to bet on for the number of stitches you're gonna need?

If I have missed anyone, just pick one that most closely matches the answer that you think I would have given or pick the one that answers in a manner that would most benefit you.

This has been around but it still cracks me up

Good News! Obesity Is Caused by a Virus!

This is news that just couldn't wait until I released my next P90X review.  It's just too big.  Researchers have released a study that obesity could be caused by a virus like the common cold.  It's bad news for some people but it's wonderful news for a lot of other people.

First off, of course, obese people have to be completely relieved.  It's not their fault.  There's nothing they can do about it.  It's a virus and so far, there's no cure.

"Jim, I noticed you're putting on a little weight.  Are you sure you want a third piece of birthday cake?"

"It's not the cake.  I caught the fat virus.  That's what I get for using a public restroom without using the paper ass-protector thingy.  At least, that's where I'm guessing I caught it.  You don't happen to have some ice cream and chocolate sauce, do you?  That would set off this cake just right."

It also explains the report that came out last month that if you have obese friends, it's very likely that you will be obese.  You can't be around them all the time and not catch the virus.  A simple handshake, using the same phone, licking the same spoon after whipping up some fudge brownies.  It's inevitable, until they come out with a vaccination at least.